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Cory in the House (2007)
Makes me yearn for Club Penguin
This is a masterclass in comedy and storytelling. This show should be integrated into both our country and our culture and integrated into our education system. The extremely well-documented explenation for how an obese child is in the White House almost entirely without supervision is realistic and doesn't take away from plot development. We of course can't forget the wonderful plot progression as Cory learns about important life lessons about national security and how the secret service won't let him drive a jet plane, it's a good role model for children. We also can't forget Cory's single father, who works as the President's personal chef. This raises the bar for black and enslavement representation in the media. 10/10 all around, a masterpiece I'll never forget.
Groundhog Day (1993)
A great film A great film A great film A great film A great film A great film A great film A great film
I've personally never seen this as a comedy. I know there are great jokes and comedic moments throughout, but that never seemed to be the main point to me, or even the fifth. I see this as a commentary. A statement on many things. It's a commntary on how quick people will turn to crime and selfishness if there are no consequences. A statement on how pointless and empty immortality would find itself. It's a tale of self-improvement, of dedication, of how some people really do loop the same day many times over with little change to speak of. Easily my favorite thing about this film is how much of it is up to interperitation. You could see it as a mindless comedy with a cool premise like Bruce Almighty, a tale of romance, a tale of how kindess is the answer. It's never explained how the loop occurs or just how Phil escapes it, and it leaves you to fill in those blanks the way you see fit. A great comedy, romance, drama, fantasy, what have you.
A welcome surprise
Much to my surprise, I loved this film. I watched it with my sister when I was twelve because she loves Johnny Depp, and I figured I could handle what a 'meh' film I thought this would be. And I loved it. A convoluted concept executed not all too well, to be sure, but that's not where this movie suceedes for me. It's Depps charismatic wit and mindless unrealistic action within the first ten minutes that has stuck with me since I was a child. The movie is wonderfully cast, wonderfully shot, and wonderfully scored, all coming together for your perfect mindless pirate film that unfortunately went nowhere after the first film. I think this movie would have been perfect if all the supernatural stuff was removed and just was Depp on the lam stealing stuff, but otherwise a great film.
A Solid Action Film.
This film is nothing special, let's get real here. It's just your better than average action film with a cool premise and good enough brain turnoff action to keep you occupied for a short while. Again, it's nothing compared to many other action films before and after it, really leaving nothing memorable, but it's perfectly fine mindless action and I really couldn't blame someone for saying that they love it.
Suicide Squad (2016)
An overshot if there ever was one
This movie tries so much for no reason, tries to be funny, tries to be edgy, and fails at all of it. Jared Leto was a terrible choice for Joker, The Katana lady doesn't need to be there, the enchantress is terribly rendered and out of place as a character, everyone's an idiot, there's about thirty helicopter crashes, and the color pallete is just grey and blandness, it's an ugly, terrible mess.
A failure on many levels
I prefer to think there are many criteria that can all be judged diffirently as opposed to an overall rating. Things like Plot, Charatcers/Casting, Enjoyability, Visual Presentation, and heart, and by heart I mean how necesarry I think the movie is narratively. Minions fails on all five levels. It fails on plot right off the bat because you're making a movie about voiceless unfunny phallic symbols that hardly needed to be in the original film, with everything else being so vaguely tied to the main point of the story that it's actually funny. it fails in characters because again, phallic symbols, and they wasted MIchael Keaton, while the actual minions learn nothing from the experience. It fails on enjoyability because it's annoying, painfully unfunny, and has very little coherence to it's own premise. It does passably on visual presentation, the minions and pointy nosed humans are so unmemorably simplistic that you don't remember much of anything. And it fails worst of all on heart, because it's a spinoff for no reason other than the obvious, and it disgusts me that this sits very nearly atop the animation box office.
The Lion King (2019)
A major dissapointment
This film does worse in every way, which is kind of a redundant thing to say considering we all expected that. The visuals are definetely very cool, but it leaves you with characters like 'photo realistic hideous boar' and 'terribly acted lion cub'. The visuals are obviously what they spent all their money on, because the pacings horrendous, the body language and facial expressions portrayed by realistic lions is dull and unmemorable, and the casting was the worst I've ever seen (Except for John Oliver, he did a good job). Beyonce cannot act, Donald Glover can't sing, and Seth Roegen is trying too hard.
A Fun One Off Summer Movie
2019's Aladdin is by no means a great movie. In my first viewing I saw it as an innocent, fun, childhood crowdpleaser. But upon my second viewing it goes downhill fast. The second time around, the novelty's gone, you realize the songs aren't that good, and the casting of people like Jafar and the Sultan are quite offputting. It really dissapoints me that this movie can't be a remake the way Maleficent is a remake. I'd like to see them do something original and change the script in a way that actually matters. The 'changes' they made are trivial stuff like the Handmaiden that doesn't even have a name, and changing some song lyrics. I'd like to see something done diffirent that makes this stand out as a film. I still reccomend it because it's a crowd pleaser and I just didn't enjoy it because I prefer to judge films by the actual filmmaking instead of how much I enjoy the film. enjoyability's a 7/10 and a 2/10 in rewatches.
The Shawshank Redemption (1994)
The Four-Hundred And Twentieth Person To Gush About Shawshank
Shawshank is a movie I find little to no flaws. It doesn't feel it's runtime at all, impeccably cast, narratively sound, no filler, emotional, an crowdpleaser ending, and narration that actually feels necesarry. Almost every character is fleshed out in a subtle and fitting way that doesn't take you out of the movie, and it doesn't cliche the prison workers. The film takes place over twenty years, giving it stakes and a reason for the emotional connection between characters that would be manufactutred in a week in a lesser movie. The way the prisoners interact with and think of Dufrense grows and develops in a believeable and natural way. A ten/ten emorional rollercoaser that I'll never forget.
Subtle and captivating
In this cheap yt beautifully shot film of subtlety and terror, John Carpenter has made a movie that finds itself ahead of it's time, it's oscar worthy just on the camera work. The first four or so minutes are all done in one shot and it's a captivating experience. The acting is somewhat lacking and it takes a while to get to the point, but it's very cheap but it doesn't show and makes something so stupid on paper into something so real and so terrifying. And I don't know whether this was intentional or not, but giving Myers no actor and no lines really gives the character an aura of mystery and a lack of humanity that really brings the character to life. A great reccomend if you can handle a bit of filler.