Kung Fu Panda 3 (2016)
Jack Black: Po
Po : Who are you?
Li : I'm Li Shang. I'm looking for my son.
Po : You lost your son?
Li : Yes. Many years ago.
Po : I lost my father.
Li : I'm very sorry.
Po : Thank you.
Li : Well, good luck to you.
Po : You too. I hope you find your son.
Li : And I hope you find your father.
[they both walk off, everyone facepalms]
Kai : You must be the Dragon Warrior.
Po : And you must be Kai. Beast of vengeance, Maker of widows.
Kai : YES! Finally thank you. Almost makes me want to spare your life.
Po : Oh you want to spare me huh? How about you spare me the chit-chat alright let's do this.
Kai : I'm going to take your chi then the chi of every panda in the...
Po : Augh! chit-chat
Kai : In the...
Po : Chitty-chitty-chat-chat, chat-chat-chat!
Kai : In the...
Po : Chit-Chat!
Po : Never under-estimate the impact of dramatic entrance!
[Po made a dramatic move to kick open the door, door suddenly opens, oops it's Shifu!]
Po : [Shifu has made a flower bloom with the power of chi] Woah! What was that?
Shifu : That was chi.
Po : Wow! What's chi?
Shifu : The energy that flows through *all* living things.
Po : So you're saying if I-so you're saying if I teach, I'll be able to do cool stuff like that?
Shifu : No, I'm saying if you teach, *I'll* be able to do cool stuff like that.
Po : Oh.
Shifu : Mastering chi requires mastery of self. Oogway sat alone in a cave for *thirty* years, asking one question: who am I? Who am I? I'm lucky if I get five minutes before you interrupt...
Po : Aw, so now I have to sit alone in a cave for thirty years?
Shifu : Eventually. After you master teaching.
Po : Teaching? There's no way I'm ever gonna be like you!
Shifu : I'm not trying to turn you into me; I'm trying to turn you into you.
Po : [Mr. Ping has stowed away in Po's travel bag] Dad?
Li : [thinks Po is talking to him] Yes?
Po : [sternly] Dad...
[opens the bag to find Mr. Ping inside]
Mr. Ping : Yes?
Po : What are you doing here?
Mr. Ping : What am I doing? Getting a backache! Did you have to step on every rock?
Po : No, I mean why are you here ?
Mr. Ping : What was I supposed to do, huh? What if the pandas don't have food you like? You're never gonna be able to save the world on an empty stomach. I consider my presence mission critical.
Li : Oh yes, about that. We can't share the location of the village with others. So...
Mr. Ping : Oh, you think I can't keep a secret, huh? I raised Po for twenty years before I finally told him he was adopted.
Li : Seriously?
Po : Yeah.
Li : OK, I guess it would be cruel to make you fly back.
Po : [amazed] You can fly?
Mr. Ping : I'm a bird, Po.
[sees Master Flying Rhino's armor]
Po : I think I just peed a little!
Li : You have to come home with me.
Po : What? To the secret village?
Li : Yes, son. You must rediscover what it is to be a panda. You have to learn how to live like a panda. Sleep like a panda. Eat like a panda. Those 103 dumplings? I was just warming up.
Po : I always knew I wasn't eating up to my full potential!
Po : [dueling Kai in the Spirit Realm] You want my chi so bad? Then take it.
[Po redirects his chi to Kai]
Kai : Yes, the power is *mine*!
[as the chi fills his body, he begins to glow and his jade amulets float away]
Kai : Wait, no. It's too much. That's too much. No!
[Kai vanishes in a burst of light]
Kai : NO!
Po : [Po is about to perform the Wuxi Finger hold on Kai] Sorry, buddy. Gotta send you back to the Spirit Realm. Skadoosh.
[flexes his pinky]
Po : OK, that didn't work. Let me try one more time. Skadoosh.
[flexes his pinky again, then over and over]
Po : Skadoosh, skadoosh, skadoosh. What the ?
Kai : Hold on, wait! It's working. No! No!
[pretends to gag, then chortles]
Kai : No, it's not. Did Oogway teach you that little trick? Too bad it only works on mortals. And *I* am a Spirit Warrior.
Lei Lei : [Lei Lei discovers Po's action figure of Tigress] Oh stripy baby, so beautiful!
Po : Oh! Okay, careful with that, that's my action figure!
Lei Lei : Can I keep her? Can I?
Po : No...
[Lei Lei starts to get sad as if she's ready to cry; Po has a change of heart and decides to let Lei Lei have his Tigress action figure]
Po : ...problem, of course! Yeah, that's why I brought her; take good care of her.
Lei Lei : Yes, stripy baby!
[Lei Lei giggles as she plays with the Tigress action figure]