[Phyllis, dressed as Santa Claus, is handing out the Secret Santa gifts while Michael, dressed as Jesus, sits sullenly in a chair heckling her with a karaoke machine]
Phyllis Vance : [to Dwight] This just arrived from the Dunder Mifflin North Pole branch.
Dwight Schrute : We don't have a North Pole branch, idiot.
[he jumps up and snatches the parcel out of her hands]
Michael Scott : [sarcastic and deadpan] Uh-oh, what's Dwight gonna get? What is it?
Dwight Schrute : [opens the parcel to reveal another assembly piece for his gift] YES!
Michael Scott : Oh yes, it's space garbage. Dwight's gonna be able to build himself a friend.
Michael Scott : Deck the halls with crappy gifts...
Phyllis Vance : [moves to Stanley] And Stanley, ho ho ho! You've been very good this year.
[she hands him a small box]
Stanley Hudson : I have.
[he takes the box and opens it]
Michael Scott : Yeah, except for cheating on your wife. Adultery's a sin, look it up in the Bible, people. What'd he get?
Kevin Malone : He got scented candles.
Michael Scott : Oh, well that's appropriate. Lot of fire where you're going, better get used to it. You're going to H-E-L-L double hockeysticks. Going to hell, Stanley.
Angela Martin : Amen!
Phyllis Vance : [moves to Angela and hands her a wrapped parcel] And this brings us to you, little one.
Michael Scott : I can't see from here, people. Somebody shout it out. Don't make me get up.
Angela Martin : [opens the parcel] It's fabric. I really wanted this.
Michael Scott : That's fantastic. You can make another dress that goes past your feet.
Angela Martin : Andy, was this you?
Phyllis Vance : It's a secret. It was a secret.
Michael Scott : No, Andy had... Erin.
Andy Bernard : [uncomfortable] That...
Pam Beesly : Michael!
Phyllis Vance : You...
Michael Scott : [sarcastically] What, was I not supposed to say...
[Jim shuts off the karaoke machine, cutting Michael off]
Michael Scott : Wha... Turn it back on.
Jim Halpert : No.
[Michael drops the microphone, gets out of his chair and petulantly stalks into his office, slamming the door behind him]