Ed Stevens: I bought a bowling alley because it just so happens that I love the game... when played correctly, it's actually quite beautiful.
Ed Stevens: If you're not born with broad shoulders and a strong jaw, there's only one way to get the girl... you make an complete ass of yourself.
Ed Stevens: I'm a lawyer, and I own a bowling alley. Two separate things.
Ed Stevens: Sometimes two people can fall so completely in love and yet be so completely wrong for one another. It's faith's nasty side, I guess.
Kenny Sandusky: If there were two bowling alleys, exactly alike, but one of them had wall-to-wall whores, I'd definitely patronize the one with the whores.