Bad Santa (2003) Poster


Bernie Mac: Gin



  • [Willie has just passed out] 

    Gin : Look here, get himy outta here and I'll go smooth things over with Chipeska, Tell him it was food poisoning or something.

    Marcus : What do you mean, get him outta here?

    Gin : Take him to the car.

    Marcus : In case you didn't notice I'm a motherfucking dwarf, so unless you got a forklift handy, maybe you should lend a hand hmm?

    Gin : That figures. You want all kind of set-asides. Special treatment 'cause you're handicapped. You're all the same.

    Marcus : Special treatment? I'm 3-foot-fucking-tall you asshole! It's a matter of physics. Draw me a sketch of how I get him to the car, huh?

    Gin : Bitch, Bitch, Bitch!

    Marcus : Sketch it up, you fucking moron. Fucking Leonardo da Vinci.

    Gin : What'd you call me thigh-high?

    Marcus : I called you a fucking guinea homo from the 15th-fucking-century, you dickhead!

    Gin : I could stick you up my ass, small fry.

    Marcus : Yeah? You sure it ain't too sore from last night?

    Gin : You got some lip on you midget.

    Marcus : Yeah? Well these lips were on your wife's pussy last night. Why don't you dust that thing off once in a while? Asshole!

  • Marcus : How much?

    Gin : Half.

    Willie : No fucking way...

    Marcus : Just back off, Will, I got this. I got this! Okay, 30%. That's three of us. 30%, that's fair.

    Gin : Half.

    Marcus : I meant 33%.

    Gin : I meant half.

    Marcus : And 1/3.

    Gin : Half.

    Marcus : 35%.

    Gin : Half.

    Marcus : 40%.

    Gin : Half.

    Marcus : 42%?

    Gin : Half.

    Marcus : Um... 45%.

    Gin : [Thinks for a minute]  Half.

    Marcus : 48%?

    Gin : [In British accent]  Half.

    Marcus : 49%?

    Gin : Half.

  • Gin : We split the dough right down the middle. Any merchendise you take, I get to look at and cherry pick.

    Marcus : No. Money is one thing but you ain't getting the sh...

    Gin : This ain't no Chinese menu, jagoff! I tell YOU how it's gonna be. This is pricks fix!


    Willie : Pricks fix?

    Marcus : Ah, he's a fucking moron.

    Willie : Oh really? Is that how you got the upper hand?

    Marcus : Fuck you.

    Willie : Negotiating?

    Marcus : You don't like it? Next year, fuck off. I can always get another box jockey.

    Willie : Yeah and I can get another midget too.

    Marcus : Yeah? Where? You see us hanging off of fucking trees like fucking crab apples?

  • Gin : Santa likes to fuck fat chicks in the ass.

  • Gin : Sweet Jews for Jesus!

  • Bob Chipeska : I just can't help it. There's something about the guy that makes me uneasy.

    Gin : Well sure. Santa fucking someone in the ass...

  • Gin : Man is a sexual being.

  • Gin : You know what I see when I look at you? America's got a sad future ahead of it.

  • Bob Chipeska : [about Willie]  Can you maybe find out something on this guy?

    Gin : Fuck yeah.

  • Gin : [after seeing a kid has placed a game in his pants]  What's this?

    Shoplifter : I was going to pay for it.

    Gin : Wrong answer.

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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