A huge Solar flare is predicted to fry Earth. Astronauts must fly to the sun to drop a talking bomb (Freddy) at the right time so the flare will point somewhere else. Giant IXL Corp C.E.O. ...
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A gigantic serpent is captured on a remote island and shipped to an American college for experimentation. A British millionaire and an American scientist find themselves in hot pursuit of ... See full summary »
A young knight sets out to join King Richard's crusaders. Along the way, he encounters The Black Prince who captures children and sells them as slaves to the Muslims. It is Robert Narra's ... See full summary »
A man awakens from his supposed death to discover that he's from a parallel universe. He's fallen in love with his doppelganger's wife here on Earth, which sets off a chain of events that threaten both their lives and mankind.
With a drug-addled lifestyle and a prison sentence firmly behind him, Abel is determined to go straight and stay clean... as soon as he's seen to one final heist. In the house that he ... See full summary »
Two small-time thieves come together as a bizarre comic duo in a quest to make their childhood dreams come true. In a limousine stuffed with cash stolen from the mob, they take off for ... See full summary »
Kate Saunders is a successful writer of books dealing with serial killers. She is also a paraplegic as the result of a vicious attack by a killer who also murdered three woman after being ... See full summary »
Judy, Alex and Nick are three friends in their early twenties who haven't quite figured things out. Judy is stuck at a dead-end job and is about to make a big move in her life when her ... See full summary »
On her wedding night, twenty-year-old Darcy Palmer empties her fiancé's bank account and flees to New York City. Along the way, she tries robbing Brianne Dwyer, who's heading to a New ... See full summary »
The film takes place on the Greek Island of Spetses, where widowed Greek-History Professor Thomas Bradley is about to lose his research grant studying ancient love spells. He knows he is ... See full summary »
A huge Solar flare is predicted to fry Earth. Astronauts must fly to the sun to drop a talking bomb (Freddy) at the right time so the flare will point somewhere else. Giant IXL Corp C.E.O. Teague thinks the flare won't happen and wants the mission to fail so he can buy the planet cheaply while the scare lasts. Employee Haas prepares a surprise for the astronauts. While daddy Steve Kelso commands the space ship where temperatures rise, granddaddy Admiral Skeet Kelso is searching the desert for grandson Mike who's gone A.W.O.L. to say goodbye to his dad but who inadvertently crossed the path of the men from IXL after meeting desert-dweller Travis.Written by
Louis Strous <LStrous@solar.stanford.edu>
What was Charlton Heston thinking when he signed up for this disaster?? Alright, I'll be fair. I rented Solar Crisis (translation: wasted a buck) with an open mind. It had an interesting plot, so it seemed, and some famous guys. So there must be something there. Man oh man was I wrong. I realized that with the opening scene in which cheap subtitles scrolled across the screen, describing the Impeding Doom of Earth. To make matters worse, a voice-over further insulted my intelligence by reading the words too. Gee, since I was dumb enough to rent the film, they must figure I can't read either. Then came the real blow: The weak, weak acting (usually showcased by laughably over-dramatic monologues) coupled with the bland, bland writing, strewn together with the lousy, lousy soundtrack make for one nose-wrinkling mess. Dr. Haas was especially bad, as was the ship's commander whose name escapes me. We are treated to such memorable lines as: "Our only security blanket out there is ourselves" and the immortal "I'm the only one who can ever free you!" Please. Free me, for the love of God.
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