Films to avoid before you die

by t-dooley-69-386916 | created - 08 May 2017 | updated - 01 Dec 2017 | Public

These are some of the films I wished I had not seen - some are way worse than others

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1. Robotropolis (2011)

Unrated | 85 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

A group of reporters are covering the unveiling of a new facility that is completely maintained by robot prototypes. When one of the robots goes haywire, the reporters find themselves not ... See full summary »

Director: Christopher Hatton | Stars: Zoe Naylor, Graham Sibley, Edward Foy, Lani John Tupu

Votes: 1,159

Robots go bad but not as bad as the script

2. Red Rose of Normandy (2011 Video)

Not Rated | 102 min | War

Caught in the middle of the advancing Allies and the fanatical Gestapo during World War II, Klaus and Klaudia must fight their way out, only to make one last stand together surrounded in the middle of the biggest invasion in world history.

Director: Tino Struckmann | Stars: Tino Struckmann, Damian Chapa, Claudia Crawford, Jack Dimich

Votes: 389

No saving graces at all - except it ends - eventually

3. Kill the Messenger (2003 Video)

Not Rated | 83 min | Drama

Two rebel brother, Drake and Daniel, disguise themselves as Union soldiers in order to deliver a secret letter to a turncoat Union officer named Hatcher. When Drake gets injured, young ... See full summary »

Director: Timothy Alan Richardson | Stars: Jay Beyers, John Coffman, Bryce Cone, John C. Finnegan

Votes: 8

Acting and a plot so bad that it defies adequate derision

4. Pompeii (2007– )

180 min | Drama

Epic drama of forbidden love in Pompeii at the city's height of glory, up to the eruption of Vesuvius in AD 79. We follow nobles, slaves, gladiators and the secret gatherings of early Christians. Mostly in English.

Stars: Victor Alfieri, Tomas Arana, Linda Batista, Gunther Gillian

Votes: 132

Three hour yawnathon with togas

5. The Poet (2007)

R | 96 min | Drama

At the dawn of World War 2, a Rabbi's daughter and a disenchanted German soldier fall in love and are separated by the war. They struggle on a perilous journey to find one another.

Director: Damian Lee | Stars: Jonathan Scarfe, Nina Dobrev, Zachary Bennett, Kim Coates

Votes: 979

This has been rereleased more times than a homing pigeon and is still arse achingly bad

6. The Resistance (2011)

PG | 89 min | Action, Adventure, Drama

In a time of war, when occupation turns to genocide, one woman choose resistance over death and takes on the empire of Japan.

Director: Peng Zhang Li | Stars: Hu Ling Meng, Peng Zhang Li, Jeremy Marr Williams, Zhang Xiao Hua

Votes: 1,048

This is so bad it is almost funny.... then it really isnt

7. Yellow Rock (2011)

R | 89 min | Western

Five men ride into the eerie town of Yellow Rock, hoping to rescue a family member and his lost boy.

Director: Nick Vallelonga | Stars: Michael Biehn, James Russo, Lenore Andriel, Michael Spears

Votes: 443

Actually just bad with more plot holes than I dont know what

8. Lost at War (2007 Video)

Not Rated | 93 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

This is a Twilight Zone type story that involves five soldiers out on a mission. And they soon find themselves stuck in a foxhole in an apparently deserted camp. Then strange things begin ... See full summary »

Director: David A. Prior | Stars: Ted Prior, Jack Vogel, James Hayward Brinkley, Jim Hazelton

Votes: 81

A classic in the 'cant turn it off quick enough' genre

9. The Seminarian (2010)

Unrated | 101 min | Drama, Romance

A closeted student at a conservative theological seminary, struggles to come to terms with his nurtured beliefs and coming out to himself, his friends, and his only surviving family member. At this low point mentally and emotionally, Ryan ends up in a troubled online relationship which leads him to question everything he has known about God and Love.

Director: Joshua Lim | Stars: Mark Cirillo, Linda J. Carter, Philip Willcox, Alexander Matute

Votes: 484

As much fun as wart hog bating in Siberia

10. Corruption.Gov (2010)

86 min | Thriller

African exchange student, Stan Rohamba arrives in the U.S., excited to be a part of the "model democratic system". While campaigning for a powerful American Senator, Stan uncovers a host of... See full summary »

Directors: Q. Manning, John Sjogren | Stars: Michael Madsen, Lee Majors, Adam Maurer, Francesco Quinn

Votes: 109

This is the sort of badly written guff that makes you ask for your money back

11. Clash of Empires (2011)

R | 109 min | Action, Adventure

The Malay Chronicles: Bloodlines (released in Malaysia as "Hikayat Merong Mahawangsa") is an adventure feature film set against the backdrop of ancient Malay, Roman and Chinese ... See full summary »

Director: Yusry Abd Halim | Stars: Stephen Rahman Hughes, Gavin Stenhouse, Jing Lusi, Rahim Razali

Votes: 963

It will make you laugh for all the wrong reasons

12. Okhota na Vervolfa (2009 Video)

111 min | Action, Adventure, War

Great Patriotic War, Fall 1942. Red Army Major Nikolay Sedov leads a squad of scouts deep behind enemy lines to gather intelligence on Wehrwolf, Adolf Hitler's new headquarters in Nazi-occupied Ukraine.

Director: Evgeniy Mitrofanov | Stars: Vladimir Litvinov, Boris Galkin, Vyacheslav Razbegaev, Pavel Trubiner

Votes: 52

Too many issues to even begin having a go at this turkey

13. Dark Relic (2010 TV Movie)

88 min | Fantasy, Horror

The Holy Land, 1099AD. The end of the first Crusade. When the conflict began, Christian knight Sir Gregory lead over a hundred men, but now less than ten remain. They include his squire ... See full summary »

Director: Lorenzo Sena | Stars: James Frain, Clemency Burton-Hill, Tom Basden, Alyy Khan

Votes: 843

Laughably bad and a miserable waste of your time

14. And Quiet Flows the Don (2006– )

176 min | Drama, Romance, War

With World War I, the Bolshevik Revolution, and the Russian Civil War as backdrop, it's an old-fashioned, blood-and-guts narrative, filled with earthly humor and a wealth of colorful ... See full summary »

Stars: Rupert Everett, Delphine Forest, F. Murray Abraham, Ben Gazzara

Votes: 465

Its terrible in the dubbed version - but apparently quite good in Russian but I doubt it

15. Exquisite Corpse (I) (2010)

Not Rated | 102 min | Horror, Romance, Thriller

In this chilling modern-day Frankenstein tale, a brilliant young neuroscientist's world comes crashing down when his fiancée tragically drowns. After discovering a serum that can bring dead... See full summary »

Director: Scott David Russell | Stars: Steve Sandvoss, Nicole Vicius, Guillermo Díaz, Tessa Thompson

Votes: 256

So bad one can not begin to criticise

16. The Last Templar (2009– )

160 min | Adventure, Drama, Fantasy

An adaptation of Raymond Khoury's novel about a New York archaeologist researching the lost secrets of the medieval Knights Templar.

Stars: Joseph Antaki, Christopher Backus, Danny Blanco Hall, Adam Bramble

Votes: 3,486

It could not have done anymore to be awful seriously one of the worst celluloid efforts ever

17. Pressed (2011)

Not Rated | 88 min | Action, Crime, Drama

Two joyriders Jesse and Sam discover something hidden in the back seat of the car that could change their lives forever. Brian, unknown to Jesse and Sam, is desperately trying to seek a "... See full summary »

Director: Justin Donnelly | Stars: Luke Goss, Tyler Johnston, Jeffrey Ballard, Michael Eklund

Votes: 1,323

Luke Goss is ok to be fair but it is still chunder worthy

18. Man at Bath (2010)

Unrated | 72 min | Drama

Between Gennevilliers and New York, Omar and Emmanuel go to great lengths to prove to each other they're no longer in love.

Director: Christophe Honoré | Stars: François Sagat, Omar Ben Sellem, Chiara Mastroianni, Rabah Zahi

Votes: 876

Un - noteworthy porn with an awful story line

19. Sword of War (2009)

R | 139 min | Drama, History, War

German Emperor Barbarossa will stop at nothing to conquer and build his empire. But a young man from Milan, along with his army of 900 men known as the Company of Death, is prepared to challenge the Emperor.

Director: Renzo Martinelli | Stars: Rutger Hauer, Raz Degan, F. Murray Abraham, Christo Jivkov

Votes: 1,196

Some good fighting but it still blows big time

20. Brave (2007)

Not Rated | 92 min | Action

A young man is forced by the mafia to steal a bank's client data in exchange for his brother's life and discovers he and his brother have been set up.

Directors: Thanapon Maliwan, Afdlin Shauki | Stars: Michael B., Dean Alexandrou, Vanchart Chunsri, Rapeepan Buthong

Votes: 322

You need a Victoria Cross for watching this

21. Septembers of Shiraz (2015)

PG-13 | 110 min | Thriller

16 Metascore

Prior to the Iranian revolution it was a place where people of all religions were allowed to flourish. This is the story of a prosperous Jewish family who abandon everything before they are consumed by the passions of revolutionaries.

Director: Wayne Blair | Stars: Salma Hayek, Adrien Brody, Shohreh Aghdashloo, Gabriella Wright

Votes: 3,460

What were they thinking???

22. Hindenburg: The Last Flight (2011– )

180 min | Action, Drama, Thriller

About the supposed conspiracy that led to the catastrophic deadly crash of the Hindeburg zeppelin in 1937.

Stars: Maximilian Simonischek, Lauren Lee Smith, Stacy Keach, Greta Scacchi

Votes: 909

You will want the ship to blow up

23. The Hessen Conspiracy (2009)

Not Rated | 113 min | Crime, Drama, History

In 1945 a group of victorious American officers discover a stash of German jewels and try to fence them in New York.

Director: Paul Breuls | Stars: Billy Zane, Lyne Renee, Michael Bowen, Noah Segan

Votes: 578

Its got Billy Zane in it - nuff said

24. Return to the Hiding Place (2013)

PG-13 | 102 min | Drama, History, Thriller

When the Nazis begin killing Jews in Holland, a group of youth fight to save the lives of the innocent.

Directors: Peter C. Spencer, Josiah Spencer | Stars: John Rhys-Davies, Mimi Sagadin, Craig Robert Young, David Thomas Jenkins

Votes: 642

You will believe a man can act! - Only kidding it will make you want to clean the loo just to get away from it

25. The Lost Coast (2008)

Unrated | 74 min | Drama

As a group of old high school friends wander through San Francisco on Halloween night, two of them are forced to confront their unspoken sexual history.

Director: Gabriel Fleming | Stars: Ian Scott McGregor, Lucas Alifano, Lindsay Benner, Chris Yule

Votes: 435

The lost plot

26. Burnt by the Sun 2 (2010)

181 min | Drama, History, War

A look at the horrors of the Eastern Front of World War II from the points of view of repressed soldier of penal battalion and his young daughter, who stayed behind enemy lines.

Director: Nikita Mikhalkov | Stars: Nikita Mikhalkov, Oleg Menshikov, Nadezhda Mikhalkova, Sergey Makovetskiy

Votes: 3,974

Just watch the bit with the sea mine - pathetic oh and the plane taking a dump

27. The Aryan Couple (2004)

PG-13 | 120 min | Drama, War

29 Metascore

A WWII Drama about a German/Jewish industrialist who, in order to ensure his family's safe passage out of Germany, is forced to hand over his business to the Nazis.

Director: John Daly | Stars: Martin Landau, Kenny Doughty, Caroline Carver, Judy Parfitt

Votes: 1,018

Only worth watching for the over acting

28. The Last Legion (2007)

PG-13 | 101 min | Action, Adventure, War

37 Metascore

As the Roman empire crumbles, young Romulus Augustus flees the city and embarks on a perilous voyage to Britain to track down a legion of supporters.

Director: Doug Lefler | Stars: Colin Firth, Ben Kingsley, Aishwarya Rai Bachchan, Peter Mullan

Votes: 33,089 | Gross: $5.93M

29. Company K (2004)

R | 102 min | Drama, War

World War I troubled veteran Joe Delaney attempts to compile a history of his U.S. Marines company but nightmares about the German soldier he killed haunt him still.

Director: Robert Clem | Stars: Ari Fliakos, Terry Serpico, Steve Cuiffo, Joe Delafield

Votes: 275

How on Earth did this get made?

30. Only the Brave (2006)

R | 99 min | Drama, War

A searing portrait of war and prejudice, 'Only the Brave' takes you on a haunting journey into the hearts and minds of the forgotten heroes of WWII - the Japanese-American 100th/442nd. In ... See full summary »

Director: Lane Nishikawa | Stars: Tamlyn Tomita, Lane Nishikawa, Greg Watanabe, Mark Dacascos

Votes: 747 | Gross: $0.14M

Even worse than Company K, but only very slightly mind

31. Release (I) (2010)

R | 87 min | Drama, Romance

Father Jack is imprisoned for a crime that he has committed. The inmates suspect him of paedophilia and begin to persuade his teenage cellmate of this. His true crime is confessed to a prison guard with whom Jack has fallen in love.

Directors: Darren Flaxstone, Christian Martin | Stars: Daniel Brocklebank, Garry Summers, Bernie Hodges, Wayne Virgo

Votes: 535

You can have my copy - its that or landfill so take a hit for the planet

32. Police, Adjective (2009)

Not Rated | 113 min | Crime, Drama

81 Metascore

A police officer refuses to arrest a young man for offering drugs to his friends.

Director: Corneliu Porumboiu | Stars: Dragos Bucur, Vlad Ivanov, Ion Stoica, Irina Saulescu

Votes: 4,523 | Gross: $0.05M

This could have been a really good short film but is as rewarding as a used Lottery ticket

33. I Am Michael (2015)

Not Rated | 98 min | Biography, Drama, Romance

56 Metascore

Based on the fascinating true-life story of Michael Glatze, a gay activist who becomes a Christian pastor after identifying as a heterosexual.

Director: Justin Kelly | Stars: James Franco, Zachary Quinto, Emma Roberts, Charlie Carver

Votes: 4,429

I am lost for words - I'll try meritless?

34. Borstal (2017)

87 min | Drama

Set in 1971, Kris is sentenced to two years in a rural Borstal.

Director: Steven M. Smith | Stars: Matthew Winters, Patrick Kilpatrick, Tony Fadil, Sonny Denham

Votes: 337

Ticks all the cliche boxes for bad film making

35. The Night (2016)

Not Rated | 136 min | Drama

The story tells, from an accentuated hyper-realistic aesthetic, the life of Martin, a man in his forties who is desperately lonely and seeks, through sex, some company, to spend that time ... See full summary »

Director: Edgardo Castro | Stars: Edgardo Castro, Federico Figari, Paula Ituriza, Luis Leiva

Votes: 197

Porn Free

36. Kate Plays Christine (2016)

Not Rated | 112 min | Documentary, Biography, Drama

75 Metascore

Actress Kate Lyn Sheil prepares to portray the role of Christine Chubbuck, a real-life news reporter who took her own life on national television in 1974.

Director: Robert Greene | Stars: Steven C. Bovio, Christine Chubbuck, Stephanie Coatney, Michael Ray Davis

Votes: 838

Terrible vanity project that is utterly devoid of any positives

37. The Ways of Man (2014)

70 min | Drama

A contemporary evocation of Judas Iscariot trying to escape from his own guilt after betraying his best friend. He wanders into a forest and lost in himself, meets a mysterious young man. ... See full summary »

Director: Gemma Ferraté | Stars: Marc Garcia Coté, Oriol Pla, Jan Cornet

Votes: 91

Art house tosh

38. Dam999 (2011)

108 min | Adventure, Drama, Sci-Fi

After many years two mariners return to homeland with the hope of a new beginning, little did they know about a disaster that would change their destiny.

Director: Sohan Roy | Stars: Vinay Rai, Joshua Fredric Smith, Megha Burman, Linda Arsenio

Votes: 946

Avoid like a blind folded arse wiping contest

39. The Masked Saint (2016)

PG-13 | 105 min | Action, Biography, Crime

22 Metascore

A pastor and professional wrestler accepts a position at a struggling church where he helps the community both in his official capacity and as his alter ego The Saint.

Director: Warren P. Sonoda | Stars: Brett Granstaff, Lara Jean Chorostecki, T.J. McGibbon, Diahann Carroll

Votes: 566 | Gross: $0.12M

This one has a 'blindfold' so be warned

40. Helix (I) (2015)

98 min | Action, Mystery, Sci-Fi

A recently promoted cop's lavish new lifestyle is jeopardized when the central computer system that governs his futuristic city pins him for a murder he didn't commit. Now he must return to... See full summary »

Director: Eric Petey | Stars: Marc Petey, Robert L. Duncan, David Stuart, Kaare Anderson

Votes: 737

It tried .... and failed big time

41. 1313: Giant Killer Bees! (2011 Video)

TV-14 | 80 min | Horror, Sci-Fi

A young college student inadvertently unleashes a global biological disaster in the form of giant, zombie, killer bees...

Director: David DeCoteau | Stars: Derek North, Jillian Nelson, Tanner Novlan, Darren Anthony Thomas

Votes: 108

Ha Ha this is beyond terrible

42. The Pigman Murders (2015)

Not Rated | 75 min | Horror, Thriller

7 friends head to the wilderness of Connemara, Co. Galway for a weekend break to celebrate the first year anniversary of a close friend. First night in they come across a beaten and ... See full summary »

Director: Stephen Patrick Kenny | Stars: John Berry, Gerard Fallon, Mark Hutchinson, Ollie Keogh

Votes: 91

I am still in shock over this

43. The War I Knew (2014)

R | 97 min | Action, Drama, War

D-Day: A British paratroop squad are dropped off-target and wiped-out. Private Johnny Barrows is the only survivor; inexperienced, scared, lost behind enemy lines. Johnny must grow up and become a man on his perilous journey to safety.

Director: Ian Vernon | Stars: Paul Harrison, Guy Wills, Adam Woodward, James Boyland

Votes: 145

The bad film I knew

44. My Honor Was Loyalty (2016)

PG-13 | 95 min | Drama, War

Untersharführer Ludwig Herckel (Leone Frisa), is a devoted and patriotic soldier of the elite 1st SS Panzer Division Leibstandarte SS Adolf Hitler. As the action begins, we follow a small ... See full summary »

Director: Alessandro Pepe | Stars: Leone Frisa, Francesco Migliore, Paolo Vaccarino, Albrecht Weimer

Votes: 900

Bad all round



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